Men naturally desire to take charge. However, when strength and vulnerability are valued equally in intimate connections, they frequently lack role models to accomplish them. That can make them controlling instead of leading.
Men who can effectively lead in relationships and act as role models are confident in who they are. They exude confidence in pursuing what they desire to accomplish. That confidence draws women to them. They can lead with their hearts because they are content.
Women adore guys for their vulnerability and appreciate them for their strength. A submissive woman consents to or submits to her husband’s wishes in cases where their viewpoints diverge. Many cultures and religions promote submissive wives and assert that this is the law of nature or the will of God.
To be submissive, one must be ready to put their desires aside in favor of their partner. But for a woman to be submissive, she must see potential in a man. Women want a man who can lead and not control them.
This article seeks to bring out the difference between leading and controlling. You’ll also learn the traits women look for in men before being submissive. Read on.
Differences between Leading and Controlling Men
Let’s look at the differences between a leading and a controlling man.
Leading Wants to Serve, Controlling Demands to be Served
A leader will prioritize serving others out of selflessness. They set an example and contribute selflessly to show their spouse they love them.
Even when it’s difficult, they take the lead and provide service. Their level of devotion, not their spouse’s preferences, determines how much service they provide.
A controlling spouse frequently demands to be served to get their needs satisfied. Rarely, if ever, will they take the initiative to act selflessly for their partner.
They continually track the score and ensure the scales are tipped in their favor. A fair amount of reciprocity exists in all relationships, but a controlling partner pushes it to extremes.
Leading Portrays Security, Controlling Stems from Insecurity
A man who leads in a marriage does so from a position of security. The emotional stability that comes with patience, assurance, and trust is something they possess.
This entails being honest with your spouse about your insecurities and making the necessary healing effort. If you don’t do this, our marital dominance will continue to be motivated by these insecurities.
A domineering man typically exhibits some repressed insecurity that hasn’t been addressed. There are numerous sources for these insecurities. They might have endured financial hardship, witnessed adultery in their parent’s marriage, or might still be struggling with some personal issues.
Leading means God is in Control, and Controlling means I’m the Boss
A leading spouse is aware that married life is a continuous act of submission to one another and, ultimately, to God.
However, a controlling man finds it difficult to yield to anyone else’s authority. They must be “the boss” in particular situations. This is because they feel insecure or afraid and need to be in charge. They don’t even let God have authority over them.
What Women Look for in a Guy
Here are some factors to look for that can make a woman submissive.
Integrity
Each person has their own set of morals and principles. What a lot of folks can’t do is follow them religiously. A man of integrity defends his convictions without waiving them. That does not make him uncooperative. Instead, it demonstrates how devoted he can be to a union.
Emotional Maturity
When you talk to a man who has his emotions under control, he will try to understand you rather than place the blame on you. He gives you the peace of mind to talk to him about anything because you know he seeks solutions rather than concentrating on the issue.
Accountability
When you’re younger, it’s acceptable to date a guy who frequents clubs or arrives home later after being wasted. As you age, you’ll see that the best kind of man respects his partner and is responsible. Such a person knows his obligations and accepts accountability for his actions.
Commitment
One of the most detrimental mistakes you can make is picking an insecure spouse. Ensure he has no secret ex or other partner waiting to pounce. A person that’s committed to you will be devoted and faithful. He makes a concerted effort to keep things going and doesn’t treat you as a backup plan. You must look for a person who has your best interest at heart.
Goal-driven
A person with goals works hard to complete their assigned tasks successfully and is ambitious. They also strive for excellence and are typically well-organized. If you get a goal-driven man, you can be confident that he will treat you well and commit to your relationship.
Inspiring
Another important quality women love is inspiration from a man. Do his eyes inspire you to put forth more effort toward your objectives? If so, he is the ideal match for you. Your companion ought to improve your quality of life.
Compassion
Compassion is one of the most essential qualities to search for in a man. A caring spouse respects and appreciates you, even if things don’t work out. They will not do anything aimed at hurting your feelings.
Courtesy
How does your potential treat others around him, especially those beneath him? If he makes them feel unworthy and diminishes them, stay away because he lacks courtesy and may mistreat you in the future.
He Prioritizes You
The ideal relationship is one in which the partners prioritize their relationship with one another. A man who genuinely cares for you would consider you when making judgments. Before making decisions, he will take into account your preferences, needs, and interests.
Final Thoughts
Women want a leader, not a domineering man who stumps their authority and leaves them out of decisions. By knowing the qualities to seek in a man, you can plan and have reasonable expectations of your possible mate. That can entail making a list of traits to seek in a partner and adhering to it. As a woman, be selective when choosing, and don’t compromise. That’s how you become happy in life.
