People get into relationships for companionship and to complement each other. In healthy relationships, you seek support and advice from each other whenever a problem arises. But healthy relationships require balance.
When one partner seems to be constantly working alone to sustain the relationship financially or emotionally, that becomes unbalanced. Putting the effort to be there for your companion without reciprocation is very disheartening. It might even negatively impact your mental health.
Some pointers on how to tell your relationship is unbalanced include feeling insecure, one-sided communication, and emptiness. Similar to how individuals require self-care, relationships also require hard work and commitment. Poor communication and passive-aggressive behavior can make a healthy relationship unbalanced.
This article will discuss in detail the tell-tale signs of a one-sided relationship and the best way to fix it.
Signs of an Unbalanced Relationship
The following are eight common red flags of a one-sided relationship.
- They aren’t Putting in the Same Effort as You
You go out of your way for them, but they don’t return the favor. A one-sided relationship becomes evident when you keep working to satisfy the desire of your partner rather than going through a cycle of compromise. Take note if they only call you when they need something but are unavailable when you have a similar need.
- You Feel Insecure
You keep making your best effort, but nothing changes. You start to doubt your value and think you’re not significant enough to discuss. Furthermore, you put the relationship first and work hard to stay in touch, spend time together, and lend a hand when necessary. You question their sincerity if they don’t put in an equal effort.
Alternatively, they could be pretty affectionate but appear uninterested in discussing the future, such as moving in together or arranging a trip for the following year.
- You Offer Justifications for Your Partner’s Actions
They constantly have unpleasant days or difficult times. Constantly defending your partner’s behavior may seem like a sign of kindness and love, but it could also indicate that you’re shielding them from the truth and supporting them. Instead of appreciating your mate for who they are, you see their “potential.”
- One-sided Communication
Your partner doesn’t share much about what happens in their life. They might be attentive and rarely interrupt you, but they don’t share their experiences. When you want a genuine conversation but find it increasingly difficult to do so because they never reciprocate, that’s a one-sided relationship.
It makes you feel like you don’t know your partner very well and might lead to unproductive disagreements.
- Lack of Progress in the Relationship
One-sided relationships rarely progress for either party since growth is not prioritized. Instead of enduring the discomfort of having difficult conversations that result in change, the partnership is typically defined by accommodation and peacekeeping. This negatively impacts how you see yourself and other aspects of your life. You end up feeling stuck.
- Feeling Unfulfilled and Empty
Even though you may enjoy yourself when you’re together, the absence of a strong emotional bond leaves you feeling isolated and possibly even a little empty afterward. You start to analyze your interactions, fret about their lack of interest, or wonder what could have annoyed them.
You should feel energized and fulfilled after spending time with loved ones. Feeling exhausted, worn out, or unsatisfied after spending time with your partner may indicate an unbalanced relationship where they aren’t attempting to meet your emotional needs.
- You do All the Planning
You plan everything, including dates, trips, shopping, initiating sex, and even checking up on them when you haven’t talked for a while. When you raise the issue, they make excuses and promise to work harder but soon revert to the old ways.
These actions give you the impression that you’re being taken advantage of or your partner doesn’t care whether the relationship lasts.
- Uneven Financial Contribution
A partner with good financial resources can offer assistance in the event of a job loss or financial challenge. The situation changes when you find yourself footing all the bills without your partner offering to chip in.
You feel used and mistreated when such situations come into play. It also creates some sought of imbalance because this happens without prior arrangements.
How to Fix a One-sided Relationship
Here are some tips on how you can rectify an unbalanced relationship.
Re-examine Your Deal Breakers and Personal Boundaries
Assess your contributions to the relationship, including time, emotions, and resources. Explore your boundaries, which entails being clear about what you can and can’t tolerate. This will enable you to emphasize the things that matter and decide if it’s worth fixing.
Communicate Regularly and Honestly
Set aside time to discuss your boundaries and how they affect the relationship. Good communication is vital for a healthy relationship.
Being brutally honest about your needs is also necessary for the conversation to bear fruit. The only way to achieve balance is to discuss and work together on the best way forward.
Accept Your Partner’s Behavior
Even when someone wants to change their behavior, there could be a limitation to how much they can change. For instance, your partner might be an introvert or not very good in the kitchen. You must learn how to live with them through mutual understanding and acceptance.
However, this does not imply that you accept someone unwilling to work on improving themselves in some areas.
Therapy
Therapy, whether in-person or online, can be very beneficial in figuring out relationship problems, which in turn helps you develop coping mechanisms to deal with the things that upset the balance. A second opinion from an impartial party might help you see things clearly and come up with a solution.
Bottom Line
Every relationship is different, and it’s acceptable if partners occasionally go through personal struggles that prevent them from contributing equally to the relationship. However, when one partner constantly makes a more significant contribution, it becomes an issue that needs to be addressed to avoid problems in the relationship.
You can fix the situation through much effort, including open conversation, reflection, and therapy where necessary. It will work as long as both parties want it to work.
